pookie loo- alive and sober!
Omigosh guys- I'm afraid I have much drama to report.
Wait...I have to poop...
I'm totally back! Alright, well, if you're paying attention, you'll see that my last post was made over a year ago. Yes, unfortunately, the rumors were true; pookie loo has been in rehab.
Don't get me wrong- Wonderland was, like, the rehab center in West Hollywood. 300- thread count Egyptian cotton sheets and parrafin wax treatments by the pool. Way luxe. And Britney and Lindsay? Don't even get me started. But rehab was totally hard. First and foremost- whose leg do you have to hump to get a vodka tonic in that place? They were total Nazis about that kind of thing though...I think it was one of the steps- I don't know. For Christ's sakes, I'm a fucking dog not that guy from A Beautiful Mind. As if I can remember all that crap. Then there were the trust exercises...I had to lead Alec Baldwin and Kim Basinger's Yellow Lab around blind folded-poor guy, they're in this, like, totally ginormous custody battle over him- do you know how that ended? With my ass getting humped, that's how. But hey, in rehab, action is action.
Anyways, now I'm back home...the Owner is totally pumped. She won herself a daytime Emmy while I was away (I was so bummed I couldn't accompany- I had this killer red frock by Marc Jacobs specially made) which has greatly increased her Hollywood clout. In fact, she's getting ready to meet with some director at Table 8. I don't know who he is. Some Jew...
I'll be back soon with more gossip, life advice and hump-stories!
xOxOx (OMG- I missed you all soooooo much!)
*pookie loo* <3333
Wait...I have to poop...
I'm totally back! Alright, well, if you're paying attention, you'll see that my last post was made over a year ago. Yes, unfortunately, the rumors were true; pookie loo has been in rehab.
Don't get me wrong- Wonderland was, like, the rehab center in West Hollywood. 300- thread count Egyptian cotton sheets and parrafin wax treatments by the pool. Way luxe. And Britney and Lindsay? Don't even get me started. But rehab was totally hard. First and foremost- whose leg do you have to hump to get a vodka tonic in that place? They were total Nazis about that kind of thing though...I think it was one of the steps- I don't know. For Christ's sakes, I'm a fucking dog not that guy from A Beautiful Mind. As if I can remember all that crap. Then there were the trust exercises...I had to lead Alec Baldwin and Kim Basinger's Yellow Lab around blind folded-poor guy, they're in this, like, totally ginormous custody battle over him- do you know how that ended? With my ass getting humped, that's how. But hey, in rehab, action is action.
Anyways, now I'm back home...the Owner is totally pumped. She won herself a daytime Emmy while I was away (I was so bummed I couldn't accompany- I had this killer red frock by Marc Jacobs specially made) which has greatly increased her Hollywood clout. In fact, she's getting ready to meet with some director at Table 8. I don't know who he is. Some Jew...
I'll be back soon with more gossip, life advice and hump-stories!
xOxOx (OMG- I missed you all soooooo much!)
*pookie loo* <3333
posted by Pookie Loo | 3:31 PM
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